Beyond the Outburst – Learning to Listen
My wife was the gentlest person I knew, but now, around 5:00 PM, she becomes a stranger. She screams that I’m a kidnapper. I’ve tried logic, I’ve tried arguing, but it just makes it worse. Is there a 'switch' to turn this off?
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I’m really sorry you’re going through this—it’s incredibly hard to see someone you love change like that. What you’re describing sounds like common behavioral changes in dementia, often called “sundowning,” where confusion and agitation increase in the evening. Unfortunately, there isn’t a simple switch to turn it off, and using logic or arguing usually makes it worse. It can help to stay calm, reassure her gently, and redirect her attention. I found this resource on dealing with behavioral shifts really helpful. You’re not alone in this, even if it feels that way.